You Just Can't Plan That...

The last few weeks were among my favourites of the year! They saw hours of planning and preparation that involved excessive shopping and loads of hype! Checking details on-line, making calls and visualizing every moment until an image of perfection formed in my mind. Sounds a little like my annual quest for the Norman Rockwell Christmas experience. But, it's August and I was dreaming of the ultimate family vacation!!! As my family gets older, and the grown boys graciously bow out of summer holiday travel in favour of work, hockey and girlfriends - I treasure with even deeper gratitude, the fragility of secluded family time. Carving out a mere 10 days from the 365 seems easy in the grand scheme of things, but in our reality, earmarking 10 days for fun and frolic is pushing the envelope! That's why, when I steal precious time away from the busy lives we've each designed here in Orleans, moments DO take on that magical flavour of Christmastime - when the world seems to stop because we've decided to call a "time out" and enjoy each other.

When I sit back and look over all of the "magical" journeys this family has taken, whether it's Christmas morning, March break or summer vacation, there is one element of consistency among them: Stress-filled anticipation, combined with planning each detail to the most granular level! I would picture the Martha Stewart holiday gathering (I own every one of her holiday books), the traditional Christmas morning and a vacation lifted right out of the pages in my glossy travel brochures. I'd spend hours working through checklists, making up itineraries, writing lists and more lists...sparing no detail. But the funniest, MOST consistent and reliable attribute of every single holiday is that, no matter how well planned it was, the fondest and most cherished memories were created through moments that simply can't be planned.

I'm talking about ringing Sydney Crosby's doorbell in Dartmouth, Tyler winning a ping pong tournament in Dominican, and being crowned "king Arthur" of the resort, and having cousins turn up unexpectedly in Orlando to ride the Hulk with us!. The spontaneous laughs, the laid back attitudes, the extra time to play a game of cards or eye spy...Meeting new people and getting re-connected with old friends and dear family - those are the unscripted pieces of a great vacation. I'm happy to say that this year's trip boasted its own unscripted moments!

As expected, I wrote lists, made copies of my itineraries, double checked my bookings, packed extra of everything - and set out for another "perfect" experience. I anticipated 10 days of natural beauty in the mountains and precious family time in the prairies. What I didn't expect was the power of the Rockies! Breathtaking majesty that captures the spirit and affects an inner sense of relaxation that no spa in the universe can replicate! I also couldn't have planned all of the fun we had with Tyler, Cameron and Samantha as they discovered the wildlife, the glacial lakes, the hot springs and the mountain village of Banff.

Conversations seemed richer, games we played, music we shared and even the night time silence seemed sacred. Every minute was cherished with genuine enjoyment - and what I loved most was that we didn't have to rely on amusement rides or commercial interventions to dictate our "fun quotient"! Hikes, drives and downtown strolls gave us plenty of thrills with the pure and unexpected magnificence of our surroundings. We'd pop into Starbucks for an afternoon frappacino and talk about everything from outer space to ice fields! Time seemed to stand still...but only temporarily! Five days after checking in to our mountain paradise, we were off to phase two of the journey:A family wedding in Saskatchewan. We were rested, revitalized, even manicured!

Again - every detail was planned for this leg of the trip: Wedding gifts, shoes, suits, ties and dresses - all wrapped in dry cleaner plastic and stowed in a special "wedding suitcase" that was treated like the holy grail. We left the Calgary foothills and landed in the middle of a scene from Corner Gas! This Saskatchewan setting cried out for the making of memories. It was the Hallmark of both "unexpected" and extreme - a natural launching point for new holiday experiences - none more important than a celebration of marriage. The first of 27 grandchildren walked down the aisle - and you don't often get a chance to plan a vacation around such a monumental event, especially not in the heartland of the prairies.

As with anything in nature, subtle characteristics are amplified when superimposed against a contrasting backdrop. The landscape seemed even flatter when experienced immediately after a complete Rocky Mountain immersion! Twenty one people under one roof seemed like a large crowd in contrast to our little cocoon of five. The big prairie sky was bigger and the endless grain fields seemed eerily ominous as they stretched, uninterrupted, to the horizon. Both landscape and lifestyle were dramatically different from anything we knew, yet we still managed to uncover a few universals and breed some familiarity through music and dance moves, tumbling and long walks, cold beer and a good game of pool; water skiing and BBQs!

This trip was a journey through the country, the mind and the spirit. It was an education not only about glaciers and grain elevators, but about priorities and family values. It was a reminder that despite dramatically different surroundings, vastly different lifestyles, tastes and opinions - family bonds always lead us to a common ground; a higher ground! When you are part of a huge family - that's probably one of the greatest unplanned takeaways you could hope for. Each one of my kids found their own way to uncover common interests with their cousins, and in a very short time they grew lifelong relationships based on similarities. Differences, though dramatic, became inconsequential. Whether on the dance floor, in a game of Risk, in the swimming pool, or at the lake, common interests were punctuated...Some even found common ground at the wedding itself through familiar hymns and prayers they hear at school.

I could write for days about my "spotty" faith, parenting philosophy and attitude about kids in sports or creatures in nature but, whats infinitely more important is the way families from different places and perspectives can spend beautiful time together by focusing on some fundamentals we all can share: a desire for fun, laughter, good company and a need to feel valued. It was so refreshing to see such a diverse group of cousins figure out ways they could enjoy each other - and they came up with an endless supply of ideas: Mud wrestling in a puddle on a country road, playing extreme hide and seek, football and stargazing under the awesome night sky - their camp out in a trailer, campfire in the pit and every other backyard adventure met that fundamental human desire to play, laugh and be a valuable part of something!

So here's to spontaneous epiphanies in the prairies! Maybe it was my pre-wedding "mountain zen" experience that cleared out the cobwebs...all I know for sure is that 21 very different people from very different places spent many days together under one roof and we've been adding facebook friends ever since! In addition, we experienced a beautiful wedding, danced the night away in celebration and drove the Saskatoon streets trying to find our way back to the hotel when all was said and done (My GPS was sleepy). Once more, the fondest memories came from the most unexpected situations and you just can't plan for that.